Thursday, May 14, 2015

Down the Rabbit Hole

I've been seeing my oncologist weekly.  Trust me, it's not my idea of a good time.  He's probably getting just as sick of having to fit me into his schedule every week as I am of having to drive up and down the hill every Thursday and Friday.  Every week I have to have have my blood tested.  Today they took 4 vials, last week 1, the week before it was 9.  (It's like they make it up randomly.)  My blood cell counts keep dipping lower and lower.  I could tell at my last appointment that he was torn whether to let me continue to go another week without changing anything, or whether to take action.

Right now, my hemoglobin/red blood cell count is very low.  The normal range for hemoglobin for women is 11.7-15.5.  Mine has been slowly declining from 9.8 to 8.9 to 8.2 down on 5/7/15 to 8.0.  That's on the line of "must take action".  What it means practically, is that I'm severely anemic.  I get a tightness/heaviness in my chest from lack of oxygen.  (Red blood cells carry oxygen to all of your bodies tissues and organs.)  I told my Dr. that my heart was racing while I was hiking last week, and he said "Oh, no!  Don't do that!  No walking up hills!"  Dragging my butt to and from work everyday is almost enough to do me in, and when I try to do extra - like folding laundry, or mopping the kitchen - I can hear my heart pounding in my ears.  I'm getting headaches, occasional nausea, and simple activities like blow drying my hair make me feel worn out.  When I asked how low we're going to go, he said that we can go down to 7.  We'll see if I can still function if I dip down below where I am right now.  He also told me that I was looking very "caucasian".  I think that's his nice way of saying that I'm pale as fu**.  Upside - they did give me a B12 shot last week, and I feel like that helped give me a little energy for a couple of days.

Platelets also continue to be low.  Normal is 140-400, mine are sticking at 46.  Low platelets mean that you bruise easily (no pinching my arms, Keith!), bruise for no reason (hey, where ARE all of those bruises on my hands coming from?), and need to be careful about cuts and scrapes, as your blood may not clot well.

Besides the reds and platelets, my absolute neutrophil count has been low as well.  Your ANC are white-blood cells that pretty much make up your immune system.  My count dipped down to 936 (normal range is 1500-7800).  When you get below 1000 you are at a much greater risk of developing an infection, so it's important to avoid crowds, stay away from sick people, and be alert to any signs of illness.  When I left last week, my doctor gave me his card and told me to call him if I noticed anything unusual.  "Like what?" I asked.  "Like ANYTHING" he said.  This was a little freaky.  My doctor is not usually an alarmist.  I tell him I'm tired, he tells me I'm old.  I tell him I'm getting fat, he tells me I'm a renaissance beauty (not sure if I should be flattered or offended on that one) so when he tells me to call him if I feel weird, I know I'm living in the danger zone.

Keith and I were going to take a small trip for my birthday last week, but with my numbers so sketchy, and me unable to do very much physically, we've had to postpone it until I'm doing a little better.  Stupid cancer.

The one piece of good news that I did get is that they tested my BCR-ABL (cancer cell level) again on 4/30/15 and it has gone down to 12%.  Not only a step - a leap this time - in the right direction.  So at least I don't feel like it's all for naught.  At least I'm suffering for a reason right now!  And like I said, the doctor is confident that my numbers will begin to improve, here, eventually.  He believes that the Sprycel is working well to suppress the leukemic cells, and that it is just taking a little while for my "good" stem cells to realize that they need to kick into high gear, and up their production to make up for the deficit.

Meanwhile, "Either the well was very deep, or she fell very slowly, for she had plenty of time as she went down, to look about her, and to wonder what was going to happen next." - Alice's Adventures in Wonderland, Lewis Carroll

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