My appointment extravaganza at UCLA did not start off well. Firstly, it took us almost five hours to get there. So I was over an hour late for my 7am appointment. I called as soon as I knew that we weren't going to make it (due to some accidents, and terrible monday morning traffic), but no one was in to answer the phones yet. So I called right at 7am, and spoke to someone nice that told me to just try to get there as quickly as I could, and they would squeeze me in. Whew.
So at about 8:15 we finally got in and parked, and I went to have my echocardiogram and the girl at the desk told me absolutely not. We were much too late, and they could not - contrary to what we had been told - fit me in; I was going to have to reschedule. Arg. So basically, I got up at 3am, had been on the road for 4+ hours for no reason at all. She was pretty unyielding, and it seemed like there was no way it was going to happen, so I walked away, and went on to complete my other scheduled tasks for the day.
Went down and had a chest x-ray - which took a total of less than ten minutes, from start to finish. Moved on and had labs drawn - the tech asked what I had done to make my doctor mad, as the order was for 9 vials, and one pee test.
Keith and I were starving, but I had an appointment scheduled with the social worker at 10am, so we didn't have time to jet off and find something to eat. The social worker is my favorite person so far that we've met at UCLA. Great sense of humor, great source for information - she gave us info on discounted housing, what to expect timeline-wise post transplant, and listened to our concerns. This appointment ended up going long, and we were with her for over an hour.
Next up was more labs (just 3 vials this time) to test BCR-ABL, and another superfluous CBC and metabolic panel, then Keith and I were finally able to go get something to eat before my scheduled 1:30 appointment with the Oncologist.
Turns out, going out to find something to eat in west LA at noon is a shit show. Every thing was super busy. We ended up at a filthy Chik fil a. The food tasted good - but again - we were starving, but the facilities were so dirty. They only gave us one napkin apiece, and it was just generally loud, unsanitary and disappointing.
The fun continued with an appointment with my Onc. She came in and told me that she was concerned about my ability to stay on Bosulif because of the rash that I got, and they she recommended that I proceed to transplant. They have identified three 10/10 matches for me, but she has not chosen the best candidate yet. Once transplant is decided upon, depending on the donor's schedule, I'm looking at a timeline of 4-6 weeks before the transplant takes place. Whoa. Just whoa. (I totally expected her to say 4-6 months, and I'm pretty sure that my face drained of all color when she told me this.) I suggested that since I had not had any further adverse reaction to Bosulif, that I would like to stay on the drug for 2-3 months to see if it could be effective for me. She agreed to call me when the test results came in for my BCR-ABL, but also expressed her doubts that Bosulif would have had any effect on my levels, considering I'd only been on it for a month (which included a 4 day drug break due to rash). I felt sick to my stomach, knowing that I was facing a summer in the hospital. I was so thankful that Keith was there with me so that he could ask questions, and hear first-hand what the doctor had to say. So much gets lost in translation when I'm trying to re-convey everything that was said.
The cherry on top to my already stellar day was a 4pm pulmonary function test, which crushed the last shred of hope that we had to get out of LA before rush "hour" traffic. The test was...interesting. A lot of breathing into a machine that measured my breaths, exhalation, and lung capacity. At one point the tech asked me if I had asthma - which I took to mean that I was failing the test, as I do not have asthma, as far as I know. (I've always had a little trouble catching my breath when exercising hard, but had attributed it to being overweight and out of shape.)
We left LA around 4:30pm and were able to stop for dinner,and make it home by 9pm, so I feel like we did really well traffic wise for the end of the day.
Digesting the news that I was looking at having a transplant in a month or two was incomprehensible, and we were both sad, quiet, and subdued for several days. Who was going to take care of our cats? How were we going to be able to afford it? What was I going to do about work? My health insurance? Who was going to take care of the rental house? Who could we get as an alternate care giver while I needed constant monitoring? Our heads were spinning, but we're both strong people, and even stronger together, so we knew that no matter what, we'd be alright.
Fast forward to Friday - four days later. I was online shopping for wigs (I think I'm going to need a wig if I lose all of my hair. I look like Axel Rose in hats/bandannas, and I'm not confident in the shape of my bare head) when my doctor called me. She had just gotten my BCR-ABL test results and I was down. Down to 5.6%. Which - lets face it - is incredible. When you consider that I was at 9% back in March, and I was only on Bosulif for one month, the test results are incredible. She suggested that if I wanted to wait 3 months and retest, she was amenable to that plan. Holy shit! The doctor that told me that she didn't believe that the med that I was on would have any effect just gave me a reprieve? A small miracle.
I hate to admit it, but I've got such mixed feelings about this result. On one hand, I'm overjoyed that I'm finally having a good response to TKI. On the other hand, historically, on other TKIs, I tend to respond for a number of months (usually 9 or so) and then my BCR-ABL climbs. So am I really just delaying the inevitable by waiting? Am I merely postponing a transplant, or have I dodged a bullet? Is this just a temporary reprieve so that we can get our shit together and get better prepared, or is it the result that I've been so fervently hoping for for the past three years?
Too soon to tell.
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